We recently published a publicly available email verification service based on our EmailVerify.NET , an award-winning and renowned email authentication module for the .NET platform; while I cannot answer for every other service you mentioned, I certainly can do this for ours:
- EmailVerify.NET does not use the VRFY command at all, as this can lead to potential bans on external mail exchangers;
- a blacklist is always possible, and Netiquette should always be followed when performing a verification task (although there are no written rules here): our component allows you to bind yourself to any available IP address and cyclically start outgoing IP addresses during the verification process, thereby increasing the number checks that can be performed at the same time, while reducing the likelihood of a ban.
My experience also shows that most email authentication services out there do not offer the quality you would expect for even syntax checking (there are at least 7 different RFCs, a simple regular expression is not the right choice here); before choosing one, I suggest you ask for a demo with your own data examples (EmailVerify.NET has an online demo page that you can play with if you want). Most, for example, do not support quoted words or non-ASCII domains or mailboxes, which are currently becoming quite common or do not filter out one-time (temporary) email addresses.
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