The passenger should automatically turn off instances when not in use. Since your traffic is low, you will not need to run extra copies of passengers.
One variable that you can configure is PassengerPoolIdleTime. This tells the passenger how long to wait before closing unoccupied instances.
There is no PoolSize variable. However, there is MaxPoolSize, but this limit should not be hit unless you get heavy traffic.
You can find all the variables along with what they do here: http://www.modrails.com/documentation/Users%20guide.html
If you really want to dynamically change the settings, you can try calling sudo /etc/init.d/apache2 reload. This will tell apache to reload its settings, including the passenger configuration.
Good luck