Can you check the debug port that is configured on the remote computer and the one you are trying to use is the same? This may be one of the possible cases.
If you have not configured a debug port, try to configure it. Your call will always be routed through this port instead of the standard / random port handled by your server.
Here is an example of how I am doing for weblogic
set JAVA_OPTIONS=-Xdebug -Xnoagent -Xrunjdwp:transport=dt_socket,address=4529,server=y,suspend=n
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